It’s been a while since I’ve written here. Not because I ran out of thoughts, but because life has felt heavy in ways that didn’t leave much room for reflection. Instead of feeling disappointed in myself during this hiatus, I’ve learned that sometimes the pause isn’t about lack of inspiration; it’s about needing space to process before putting words to things.
Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about love, trust, loneliness, and identity. About how relationships shape us and how, at some point, we start paying closer attention to how we show up in them and how they show up for us. That relationships don’t just happen, they’re built.
To understand how I want to show up for others and for myself, I reflected on the concept of trust. That trust is something built in sometimes quieter, more practical ways. That it lives in consistency; actions matching words. In whether vulnerability feels safe or risky. That trust in yourself also matters, because when you don’t show up for yourself, you just reinforce the a message to yourself that your goals don’t really matter. That you yourself don’t even think that you are worth the effort results in insecurity.
And I think this prolonged insecurity can lead to loneliness. Not the kind that comes from being literally alone, but really from a disconnection from yourself and others. But with that, I think loneliness is less about who is around you, but more about whether you feel understood, supported, secure. That you feel grounded in yourself. Somewhere I once read you’re never truly lonely if you like who you are when you’re alone. Real connections with others amplifies what you’ve already built within yourself.
A friend asked once asked, “What if they’re done, but you’re still going?” I don’t remember what I said at the time, but now when I reflect on that question I remind myself that other people’s choices, limitations, or actions don’t get to define the direction of my life. There is still movement. Still growth. Still a future unfolding. Even when things don’t look the way I thought they would. Either way, life keeps moving, and so do we.
Right now, I’m focusing less on having answers and more on paying attention. To what feels aligned. To what feels draining. To what I’m no longer willing to tolerate and what I want to move toward with intention.
Progression matters more than perfection. Intention matters more than appearance.
I don’t have everything figured out. Not even remotely close. But I do know that clarity comes from honesty, and growth comes from staying present with yourself even when things are uncomfortable.
And for now, that feels like enough.
What’s the Tea?
integrity, loyalty, identity, authenticity, clarity